boring weekend. stayed at home for tv, vcd and computer. chiong o2jam, play till my finger cramp.

maybe its a way to not think about anything.

my love and laopo asked me out to study but i didnt turn up. real sorry eh. was too engrossed in my tv. cant think if any other stuff. its good thing you know. (:

lets see... what else can i write? xy asked me out but he slept till 5plus. was real angry. so what?

i ate alot today.
i stared blank to the tv, almost cried for nothing.

wanted someone to hug.
wanted someone to console me.
wanted someone to talk to.
wanted someone to make me laugh.

but i know its quite impossible so i kinda gave up.

thats all i did for today.


big big big bug bug bug buggy liars. RAHH! i dont know what im talking about either.

;i am afraid


我不知道我在哪里...

='[

momma came back home from hongkong yesterday night and bought quite some stuff. at least lotsa bags and earrings for me. =D mickey mouse! my bro got keychain/ring.


a table full of food again since a year ago.


HK$150



for my bro. =D


i tried smiling.


with my vcds and mickey. wahaha!


and of course bestie, ritter sport choco!


so i smile again for it.

;
english paper 1&2 today.

wrote 6 pages for both compo and leaflet. all rubbish and i dont know what to say bout our fugly school! cant even think of anything good. goodness me, poor me.

paper 2 was okay. dont know how to do 3 questions. o.o haiyah. forget bout it.

went to cwp with yixuan and tinghui after school, both of them went off and i saw rui jie and emilene jie so tag along. went to mac for SEAWEED FRIES!! rui jie is right, they are like drugs. so addicted man. =/

i choked on seaweed plus cough so i coughed real bad, teared and couldnt talk. felt real pathetic. i dont know what im doing also.

went up to popular for pen and then to the 1st storey for snacks. stella bought sweets and wanted to give me but rui jie snatched it. o.o

joked alot and laughed alot. was real tired.

i did nothing at home, o2jam cocked up and i slept with contact lens. my eyes should hurt like hell now but instead, i felt nothing. dont know why.

woke up for dinner, again. i dont know how many meals i have a day. at least 4.

and im 47kg now. i gained 5 more kg since the last height and weight.

i dont care.

=D

;i am afraid


today can be one of the most unlucky day i ever ever had.

i cant sleep since 1am. keep waking up from dreams, bad dreams. dreams that scare me off. fugly dreams. yes.

woke up around 5.45am and prepared for school. rain damn big, bus damn slow, bus stop damn crowded. no matter how many people there were, i just couldnt see you. i felt lost and i dazed off. stupid bus wouldnt wait and there aint no more space for another me. wanted to call cab but couldnt get through and the others were all hired, if not on call.

i must be the most pathetic soul around.

got on the bus and sat with weihan, my guy twin jinghan and gary. weihan tell me i more and more cute. LOL. although its out to tease but it somehow brighten my day.

last few periods killed me. had to clean up and rush maths file work. i wrote non stop till they hurt but me justin still say its too little. wtf? dont do lah!

the table is a disaster. full of his name, the words he said... my hands smell like gif now.

mr justin is just too picky. whatever.

waited for lynn laopo to get home then sat here till now.

i watch till last episode le. so damn nice. wahaha!

gonna start watching 大长今 already. i think i'll take a longer time due to the scary number of episodes.

WAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

;i am afraid


guys are big big big jerks! arghs!

forget bout it. damn.

i ate alot today. cup noodle, bee hoon, nasi lemak...

im fat, yes.

i must wake up tomorrow. MUST!

MUST MUST MUST!!

;i am afraid


maybe my heart died. i dont feel a thing. i dont feel sad, i dont feel happy.

spent the whole day watching vcd and playing o2jam. cant believe i fail trying to wake up. what a joke. =/

i got nothing to blog about lah really.

meet up with yencheng and sylvia in the afternoon to 888 and bought blue colour contect lens. sylvia bought green. then went home. everyone seems to be lying. i dont know why. i dont know anything.

mid year starts on friday and im semi prepared. what the fuck lah everything i do seems to be wrong.

im losing all confidence, all the happiness in me. i cant even feel abit of sadness.

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG? ARGHS!!

RAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

;i am afraid


i have absolutely nothing to do right now. he dont talk to me, i dont talk to him.

school was tiring. no pe, went crazy with yixuan, as usual. thats all.

just reach home not long ago, siew ling cried for toilet the moment we step in the lift. shes going real crazy and i think i am as well.

watched the show again last night and i cried at every freaking thing. i dont know what im doing also lah. then had the computer on whole night listening to the same song. i must be mad! i should go choke myself with seaweed fries or something like that. hey i think i've said that in previous entry right? im gonna do it someday.

i go watch the show now. byebyebyebyebye!!!

RAHH!!

;i am afraid


watched 情深深 雨蒙蒙 yesterday night, or can say midnight in my room till 6am i guess. its fugly nice cause i watched it for the 3rd time already. xD

i just cant sleep lah. but woke up around 2plus. wahaha. (: nice feeling though, try it okay.

................. commented bout my bad looking hair. i know, i know it well because nobody said it look good. yeah nobody at all. i know i know i know i know!!

so now im trying to look like last time. waste $90, spoil my hair, get comments like its ugly. yes so why not spend another few dollars to look my best. joseph say he bringing me go cut my hair. (:

i have a strange feeling. somehow, everyone is starting to leave me. now, i feel like im alone, talking to people i dont even know.

i should just choke myself to death with seaweed fries or something.




;i am afraid


okay im back.

school was alright, got so tired drawing chairs. =.= then kim loh couldnt stop shouting, had oral exam and teacher said i was good. wahaha. =D

went out with xy, went town. ate at wisma and far east. talked alot with him. then after that saw danny, he going to malaysia so he sent me up to my house since he so damn free. all disturb only. =/

I BROKE MY TOE NAIL!! RAHH!

dont wanna talk much bout yesterday anyway.

woke up at bout 8 to school for the concert celebration. ate pizza and chicken wings. for the past few years, the food always not enough. today, no one can finish the food and we are left with one whole box of chicken wings. the guys tried so hard to finish them and zhengkang being our big eater cant even tahan also. he feel like puking already. o.o kelvin is next zhengkang!! wahaha.





our programme for the concert that day. (31st march)

went home around 2. slept till 9. how nice. (:

;i am afraid


spent the day painting nails, watching vcds...

i finish one whole bar of chocolate that joseph gave, after so many bars. he on purpose wanna make my sore throat worse only. haha. =p

went to lunch+dinner with him and he helped my dad buy his share too. how nice. (: thanks leh!

slacked at home. watched holland V repeat with both of them. -.-

okay, i blog when i have nothing to do.

hahahaha!!

stupid danny sms me to tell me got big rain. LOL. xD

ah fai ask me go malaysia around june time, again. =/ dont like that leh. i also want see you dance but you know i cannot lah. if i really cannot go then i wish you luck only lorh. paiseh ah! and hope you and your gf dont quarrel le. small thing only. okokok?

okay i have simply nothing else to write bout.


男： 会不会。。。你就是我消失的双胞胎呢？
男： 在怀孕的时候，本来是一对双胞胎，但是有一天，有一个在妈妈的肚子里突然消失了
男： 消失的双胞胎。。。
女： 为么你会有这种想法？
男： 我觉得在妈妈的肚子里，就已经跟你在一起了。。。


7 more days to mid year exams. RAHH!! =/

;i am afraid


school = dread

argh. stupid danny make me want someone to accompany me for lunch also lah. he ask me i reject. -.- and he freaking live at tampines.

yeah! i finally figure out the spelling for 'tampines' already (:

still got face to tell me to treat him if he come down to woodlands. he'll probably faint on the way on his bike. thats what he said. i never ask him come also! LOL. funny sia the guy.

who want accompany me now?
RAHH!!

sian ah! hungry and bored.

=/

;i am afraid


aiyah i cant sleep. i cant i cant i cant. =/

my momma is asleep in my room right now. so how i sleep you tell me. arghs. but shes not the reason lah. im just feeling so bad.

but big thanks to joseph's chocolates. he makes me smile all the time. haha. (: i got them when i said i was hungry. silly guy brought me those. xD how nice of him.

oh god i feel like slacking at home tomorrow.

ARGHS!!

;i am afraid


my day is real real bad.

mass run and then caught for skipping lesson with yixuan and tinghui. grace wants late slip and ugly moley took my handphone. then talked with yixuan, tinghui, fer LOVE and lynn after recess at hall, sat at their class and kena caught by justin again. went RTP and mdm sfhjdsjfh (dont know what her name lah, ah jun use to call her mdm blah blah blah xD) talked to me regarding my handphone.

what freaking rules? parents MUST go down to get it? i dont care lah dont disturb my parents. they not free for crap you give okay. im not free either. WASTE MY TIME ONLY. o.o

back to class for last 3 periods only. SS and maths. justin was asking me to talk nicely to moley but he cant do that so why should i?

got back my handphone anyway but he let me wait for freaking 1/2 hour till he come back from makan.

I HATE TO WAIT!! WHO IS HE TO MAKE ME WAIT? AND TALK ALL RUBBISH TO WASTE MORE TIME. SO DAMN ANGRY LAH OKAY.

haiyah. =/

meet up with my darlings after that, saw weijie on the way. sam called and sounded real seh. think he did bad thing, fer knows what. =/ really dont know what sam thinking. dont know why he never go talk to fer himself.

went fer LOVE house first, slack abit then went to bpp for lunch at mac and to trim eyebrows. walked and joked around there.

finally... seaweed fries is back!!

wahaha~ so nice can!

later on...







monkey business at the toilet xD


kena scold by the shop auntie o.o


eww~

went to the playground in there at 2nd storey i think. we sat there, went crazy and took lotsa photos. we got real mad, couldnt stop laughing. =D




my dearest LOVE (:


my dearest LAOPO (:


maybe i should take a peek at whats up there. hahahaha!!


yes they love me.


my dead hair. =/


how xin fu. keep kena kiss. =D


but she can be quite fierce at times.


but we are still fun.


we daydream alot.


cig case = bad o.o

yea i know. stop looking. wahahaha!!~~


stop it lah! one last kiss only!!


okay. byebye. o.o


sounds just like a story.


HAHAHA!! =D

;i am afraid


i said i'll update right? oh well, forget bout it okay, =p

to continue from my ah ma's birthday, i drank alittle wine and they chat, alot. they were kinda loud and they joked bout my voice cos i couldnt speak up. my little cousins came and they were nice. (: food was kinda okay but i cant taste the curry then. sang song for ah ma and ate 2 slices of cake. =p thats all i can remember lah. not a bad entry for someone with bad memory.

wahaha!

15/4 ;
slacked at home the next day watching vcds. the name of the show is 春日. korean series!! my favourite although its kinda typical but i still love it. (: oh if you are curious bout what its bout, its kinda like 巴黎恋人. mummy promised i could get hair cut the next day. (:

16/4 ;
yes as promised, we went to vista for hair cut. permed my hair and wanted to cut my fringe straight but damn the si ah gua lah. its not even straight! not to say neat. i was so furious. then he tried to talk back and momma got so angry. my hair kinda sucked at first but the lady boss came rescue my hair and looked better already. i hate the smell of my hair, i hate the split ends, i hate the roughness it has. arghs!! =/ oh by the way, si ah gua got sacked. what joke.

17/4 ;
lessons as usual and went to vista for laksa and ate chocolates that kim loh gave with fer LOVE, lynn po, xiaohui and sally. i think i butt itchy already lah. haha. my voice is still killing me. meet up with xy after that.

today ;
meet up with fer LOVE and lynn po to school in the morning and i start to like my hair already. probably my good hair day.

grins*

oh ya, its emilene jie's birthday and i wish you luck for everything. especially N levels. im still sorry for what i've said because i love you. have a happy birthday okay. best wishes for you and jackson. haha. (:

jessica mei's birthday tomorrow and i wish her a happy birthday in advance. see anot darling? i got xim okay. i remember your birthday. =p


i dont know if i'm doing the right thing anymore. ='[ maybe i'm just thinking too much but i just want someone to myself and only myself... thats all. maybe... i should just go away...


就算把世界给我，我还是一无所有。我要快乐，我要能睡得安稳。有些人，不抱了才温暖，离开了才不恨。我早应该割舍。哪怕笑得再大声，全都是假的。只有眼泪是真的。

;i am afraid


what a good friday.

i stayed home for tv, housework and ah ma.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AH MA!!

i wanna give big kisses to her but im too shy. wahaha!!

still waiting for them to come. my mum went to get the cake already.


i'll update later.

;i am afraid


woke up with freaking swollen eyes, went to school and friends thought i look so sick, especially with the almost gone voice. i sound like a guy. =/

samuel ate my panadols for no reason. leaving me with no medicine. pathetic. o.o

went to back gate with the girls after school and justin came out shouting. i said hi and walked away. i did nothing. (:

the dm and oms followed us around and they went upstairs. police came. o.o

i've already gone off, so...

-.-

went for the 2nd day of social etiquette at amk in the breeks restaurant. zul, wirah and haikal sat in front of me, effinda and ting hui.

first dish: mushroom soup

second dish: spag with half a chicken.
fuck okay, gonna so kill me with the amount of food. people were struggling to eat nicely but turned out so difficult to even eat the damn spag, not to say the damn meat.

third dish: brownie and vanilla ice cream. zul fed me a spoonful of... ice cream? i have short term memory. i forgot lah, its either one of them. haha. took photos but have to wait for wanie to upload them for me. (:

its quite memorable, really. zul helped me to pull the chair when i wanted to stand up. how nice. haha.

fun shit lah.


i wish i could have you back like last time. like the times we go shopping together, talk bout whats in our heart. do all the stuff that friends would do. maybe that incident just makes it cut everything off. thats the strongest feeling i have now. jie, tell me we are still the same.

;i am afraid


i just wanna cry.


CRY SO FUCKING LOUD! CRY SO LOUD TO MAKE EVERTHING GO AWAY.

but crying just couldnt help...

='[


im really going crazy soon. dont ask why.



had social etiquette in the afternoon after school, teached bout dress senses and colours... blah blah blah... kinda boring lah. the instructor like ang mohs alot, talked so much good stuff bout them. o.o


asian guys = losers?

;i am afraid


was on the way to school when i feel so bad. vomit a little lah. damn digusted but i feel better. went to polyclinic and the queue damn long. i thought i gonna die sitting there alone waiting. =/

i waited for freaking 3 hour plus then went home to change and meet up with xy. (:


why cant you just go away if you wanna use freaking vulgarities on me? go to hell with them and i'll never forgive you okay. you know i hate it like that but you made it this way. stop it! i have enough to worry about. make yourself something i wouldnt have to get angry over and then you'll be really considered a friend. how do you expect me to give in when you are hurting me over and over again? i just couldnt make myself talk to you anymore. just go away... okay?



FAR AWAY

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know
[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore
On my knees, I'll askLast chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know
[CHORUS]
So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know,
you know, you know
I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go


(: i'll believe its true once again.

;i am afraid


i came to update again because i have nothing better to do. tv is boring, sleeping is boring and im waiting for his call.

well, mummy was packing my room where she found the stupid letters my f...ed up 'friends' (with of course the inverted commas) wrote to me when we were like in primary 3. its so stupid!!

at least it made us laughed till we teared.

i shan't say what they wrote. its so embarrassing. xD


fer love covering her face. -.-


my wife. =D


pretty!


see lah! i say shes pretty already! =D


(:

;i am afraid


i feel so bad and im blogging. -.-

woke up with bad stomachache, went to washroom and came out falling halfway back to my room. i lied on the floor for awhile near the living room cause i couldnt see my way. almost fainted. i dont know what happened to me, and i had no one to help me up.

how pathetic. =/

help me vomit!! its like not coming out and it feels so sick.

disgusted?

arghs!!

!#$%^&*@

i cant even get out from bed!!

kill me!!!

i spent the day sleeping. o.o


i want you here but i cant.
RAHH!!!!!
i need your hug real bad.
BAHH!!!!!

='[

;i am afraid


okay maybe shes not talking bout me. im thinking too much, im jumping into conclusions.

dui bu qi ):

people get too emotional sometimes.

;i am afraid


woke up freaking early at bout 4plus to lim chu kang to shao mu for my greatgrandparents and my great uncle or something, my ah gong's brother lah. he die real young, lied there for 40 years already.

i slept everywhere i can cause i reach home damn tired and damn late yesterday night. reach home bout 7plus and fell asleep straight.

i dont know if you talking bout me, but hey, if you are then forget about it okay. i don care! wtf i say sorry liao then what you want me to do? i had enough. i got nothing to say lah. wait till i know the truth then i say more.


i'll remember what i've promised and i'll do it. please just hold on to me and dont let go.
thanks xy. (:

thanks pk darling. (:

;i am afraid


edited xinyuan's blog. more man already. xD

anyway, school was fun. played more then study. =x how dare me. mummy reads. i know.

there'll be physic test tomorrow and i actually brought my textbook home. o.o

just found out that i've said bad about e jie which i might have forgotten about. but i did say, i admit. then it leads to r jie and n not talking to me.

yes i may not like her sometime back but she really did nothing to me. i've said sorry to her and i'll talk to k about this.

as for n and r jie, sorry to you 2 as well. i know n is angry and i heard r jie is very disappointed. maybe thats why you bo chap me when i say hi to you. mayb thats why n kinda dont wanna talk to me. i can feel that because it means alot to me. friends mean alot.

thats why im wrong.

maybe some may say bad about me. but hey, i know now. i know what i did. its all wrong.

SORRY. ):

fabian is going away for a few weeks i guess. god bless that nothing will happen to him. i wont say much.

im real sorry, its all at the wrong time, wrong place.

;i am afraid


a few days without updates. sorry!! =p




yencheng! aint she cute? (: thats all quite sometime back at partyworld.

1/4;



jing chun!! shes so small okay. full month for her on april's fool. went to 5th uncle's house for lunch and then went back home. i wonder how my kid will turn out. haha. thinking too much already. o.o

2/4;
happy birthday to gong gong. after so much, finally something to celebrate about.





okay im bored. on the way to a restaurant called brazil at the 6th avenue located at bukit timah. nice place, nice paintings, nice people. just nice. out of words to describe the place.
i asked for a little pineapple to try cos they said its real different(im afraid of pineapple o.o) and the guy being all di siao siao gave me a piece of that almost the size of my finger tip. LOL. i ate and almost puked. =/




pictures does magic (:
thats all i have. im hungry okay. =/
VGA phone sucks.




bloody beef!! =O

this meal costed $5oo plus for 14 people if i remembered correctly. ouch.

went home all tired and i saw...


my mum couldnt make the damn hk stand properly. o.o

3/4;
skipped school, went shopping and of course kena scoldings from mum. throat killing me. how boring. =/

4/4;
lessons as usual, napfa test after school. situps, 5. inclined pullup, 5. sit and reach, 3. failed the others. okay okay, laugh all you want.

*************************

helped xin yuan with his blog just now, looks kinda gay. i dont know why. weekdays are boring. tests kill and my textbooks are all in school. arghs!!

;i am afraid